June 1, 2008

You’ve all seen websites, emails or miscellaneous articles showing the "funny English" noticed around the world. For the most part, these humorous sightings come courtesy of small businesses or independent writers, but not from official entities related to the state.

Thanks to an alert reader who was kind enough to send me a link to the website of Aleppo International Airport, I find myself able to offer you yet another example of Syrian exceptions to the above rule. I promptly add a caveat and beseech you all to once more prepare tissues in the event of hysterical laughter provoked by this reading, noting that the tissues will also help those in the “don’t know whether to laugh or cry” category.

As for the officials and the “responsibles” from various Syrian entities, they are welcome to continue sending me direct emails and/or messages through third parties, trying hard to find fault with my previous post but managing little other than frustrated irrelevant responses, and promising to add information on the Golan (as if doing this only to shut me up). Since they don’t even seem aware that their performance may be lacking (and we shall continue to be kind by sticking to the subject of communications), clearly surprised that someone actually took the time to investigate various Syrian offerings, I hereby invite them to copy the following text and paste it on the website for Damascus Airport, which I am sure will be ready just before the capital of culture year comes to an end. Likewise, our embassies should not waste a moment before doing the same, adding a wealth of information for the lost foreigners 'arrivaling" in Syria and trying to get better acquainted with Syrian cities ... or at least "town-down."

"Arriving Guide"

Important instructions for Passengers through Aleppo INTL airport form arrivaling to terminal until heading towards Aleppo city :

* We hope the passenger to get ready thier passport before get out the plane to get quick, also it is preferable to have syrain cash (to rent trolley and taxi) .

* Get in the terminal after get-off the plane by aerobridge or one of the ground gates , we hope the passengers to verify of them hand bags.

* Leave transit hall “if the passengers get off the plane through aerobridge” towards through electrical stairs toward passporting check area in arrival area ,or directly towards the passporting check area after get off the bus “if the passengers get off the plane through one of the ground gates”.

* The passengers can get touric information through toursim office within passporting check area.

* After pass the passporting check, Head towards the paggage reclaim at movable straps zone , at any lost please ask Lost office to release reclaim lost.

* Rent trolley to carry the package at package recovering area .

* After passing passporting area, the passengers pass security check,all baggages are checked by X-Ray have to be customed.

* In case accompanied by animals or plants, passenges have to consult the veterinary quarantine or the planting quarantine office.

* After passing security check the passengers can go out through arrival gate to reception area.

* Get out the terminal, the passengers can get a taxi to head towards town-down.


Banned Goods:

We hope the passengers don't carry these goods within passenger package :
* Weapons, Sharp tools, pistols and all kind of explosive materials .
* Toys weapons shaped.
* All kind of oils and flammable liquids .
* The banned customs goods.

We wish a restful and comfortable travel through Aleppo INTL airport ."


Alas, comfort may not be the first consequence of arrivaling in Aleppo Airport, even with such helpful instructions, quoted in full above. But remaining on the subject of communication, I considered continuing the comparison between Syrian and Israeli communication efforts; however, I can only admit that this is clearly of no direct relevance to the Syrian government which must be aware of its enemy's superior PR skills, since it constantly complains of the Zionist lobby's influence.

Therefore, I decided on a different route and brought the comparison much closer, to the performance of brotherly countries. Indeed, perhaps the reminder that the legible, comprehensible and functional website of the modernized Cairo International Airport, not to mention that of the even closer brotherly Beirut International Airport, actually serve a purpose may trigger some reaction from the responsibles who are responsible for their equivalent (in the widest sense of the word) in Syria. We'll be waiting.

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